new day at clay street

i'm getting excited about some changes coming down the line at clay street community. for starters we finally have folks ready to listen to a small group of us and allow us to move according to our convictions and not theirs. although i must say that we have no desire to do anything contrary to the stated vision statement, just carry it out in a little different way. ok, so it's not that different, but at the moment any change is good.

before i write any more i must admit that none of these things are our own, but a resemblance of what those that have come before us envisioned (their links are to the right). part of me is sad that this seems like too little too late and that i could still see nathan, shannon, stacy, and lora each week as i enter into worship, but then i see the austin community that has been developed and i know that they have done so much more for so many more people. anyway all that to say these are idea evolved from their connection with the father and community, not ours.

the big thing i am excited about is the evening format change. currently it is typically 20 mins worship, 45 mins or longer of preaching, and a closing song - standard modern linear design. the first change will be to "limit" to preaching to around 15 or 20 mins, close and then move to a time of food and discussion time. it is very evident that the corporate community has been a big draw and lately we are having to chase folks out of the building long after anything has officially stopped. sometimes then they move to the parking lot or playground and talk for hours. this is the time when meaningful community / ministry can happen and we are missing it. we have been placing all the evangelistic eggs in the sermon basket and truthfully it has been a bad investment (speaking for nite service only - i have not attended a morn service in quite a while).

anyway this is only the first step to get away from the central piece of the evening pie being the preaching part. preachers if you happen to stop by and read this, i mean no disrespect, but for the most part the content is irrelevant even though in another setting it would be received with accolades and it is not presented very well to the audience - just b/c you add a video clip of braveheart speaking about something coming out of his arse doesn't fix all the problems. it just makes everyone remember that they heard the word ass in church and that we showed part of a rated R movie during the sermon.

please pray with us as we strive to allow the father to direct our steps on this journey. we are not bitter young adults trying to cause problems, but are leaders who want to be obedient to help an organization carry out the great commission to a community.

now i have to go clean out my garage. Blessings, kerry

ok so i finally watched queer eye for the straight guy last night. it was actually an enjoyable show except for the fact that i guess you have to be gay to have any fashion sense. hmmm, not sure how i feel about that and i thought that queer was a bad word. oh well, so much for my subscription to GQ.

i did hear a guy on fox news this morning say "be retro - go hetero." hmmm (once again).

:) Kerry

while following endless random links i found this pic on a site. thanks michelle for reminding me how much i used to be an x file fan. btw her site is excellent!

another tylerism

tyler and i went to get ice cream tonight and on the way back he mentioned that the birds have been leaving him a feather in the yard each morning as he goes off to school. how cool and fantastical this is, i thought...until i saw the yard.

you see we have two large bird feeders hanging from the tree in our yard and our neighbor faithfully fills them each morning at dawn (another cool story) and apparently there is at least one neighborhood cat with a full stomach.

have a great week!

i was going through some old files tonight and came across this picture - sorry carl - it was just way too funny. carl is our drummer at clay street and a firm believer that trucks are capable of anything, except swimming.

what stays consistent by constantly changing? i am looking for a name for something. really, this is not a riddle although it could be. email me if you want the full crazy story.

peace and blessings!

yesterday i had a quick visit with my boss that was fired in april and he told me that i should take his old job (sans the general counsel part, he was a lawyer). that was kinda encouraging, but since he got fired doing a really good job (long story) maybe i should just keep to my small part of the world. my job is important, but relatively easy as long as you stay diligent with it. i would love the challenge of something bigger, but truthfully am enjoying the rut which i currently find myself in.

Father change me into a servant worthy of your calling. may i see everything i do as a chance to bring glory to your name.

thank you Father for healing my boy.

mucho stuffo

it seems like a lot of things are going on at the moment, most of which i am excited about. i just forget to write about them - i appreciate the friendly reminders i have received.

first thing! small fry Ty is improving! PTL! if he continues on the trend he is on it looks like another surgery won't be needed. that would be such a boost to us in so many ways. we also want to be clear that any improvement is to the glory of God. we really want this to be a look-what-God-did-in-our-lives kind of thing and want everyone to know that.

di and also had a great visit with nathan on sat and was able to hear him lead worship on sun morning. it made for a great weekend.

more later -K

answer

just FYI for all those that prayed - nick started a new job yesterday that sounds perfect for him. he is an electrical wiring technician at the fredericksburg airport. he is finally receiving the respect that his skills deserve. i am so excited for him. on his behalf - thank you for praying for him.

PAX

back

my pc is finally back up and running. i smoked a power supply last week and have been DOA since. now i have a groovy new case with lights, a see through panel, more usb ports, and a huge cpu fan. my machine may not be a mac but now it looks almost as cool as one (in a rough sort of way).

part of me says that doing good church is too complicated... i think the truth is that WE are too complicated... the truth is simple and always has been. i love nathan's current thread.

had an interesting nite at clay street. i believe now that the hand of providence had us take our leave when we did (last november maybe?) so we ourselves could heal and now maybe help others with their decision to either leave or stay. i hate it that is has to be that way. why can't a good thing just become a great thing, and then even a greater thing? whatever the case, there are folks there that hurt and i am one that hurts no more, so maybe i can be used to help others heal. i never saw this one coming - how great the Father!

something else ~ some folks moved in next door to the clay street warehouse and it seems they don't share the same affections for all the noise we make. this one could get touchy and will need the wisdom of solomon to handle. of course it is also good that 2 of the elders are lawyers. hmmm.

just got back from a few days in orlando. had a business mtg at a place that was connected to universal studios. it was tiring, but a good trip. everytime i go to a place like that i get all excited again about technical stuff. you see one day i will have a "club church" or maybe just support someone with a club-esque ministry. an example would be a light set up like on the video of coldplay's clocks and song's like madonna's die another day. Really. that's my thing and i have a feeling that it could be others' thing as well.

i'll write more about my trip later. i need to take a nap before clay street tonight.

seeking guidance from my spiritual family

i am considering an idea of starting a web site of some sort to link non-profit agencies with needs to people who want to give. the motivation for this is that i believe folks may have "good" stuff they just don't need, but don't realize that someone else out there can be blessed with it. i also have tried to fill out the cumbersome grant requests and make sure all of the paperwork is perfect and i'm just not focussed enough to complete that task.

i started working out the details yesterday while trimming my trees and right after that big branch got me. maybe i should seek the help of a doctor and not a webmaster. :)

PAX - Kerry


btw ~ you may know of a site already out there that does this. if so, let me know and i may turn my resources into helping them.

my buddy nick's new ink - ouch!

tyler is going to be a bike guy. ok by me. maybe i should visit the harley shop this next weekend!

i thought i'd give tyler some credit for helping me dig the pad for his swimming pool. this was much more work than i had expected, but he actually has been more help then i would have guessed. go small fry ty!

well the pool went up this weekend, and shortly will be on its way back down. seems my yard is not as level as i thought it was.

do you ever get into one of those stages when the only thing that can reach your soul is music? well in my spiritual life that is the way it is so i have turned back to the music of the person that has spoken to me more than any other - nathan. you see, being a sound tech allows me opportunities that not everyone has. i've got a small collection of bootleg recordings, my best being the last service that nathan played at the soul cafe. that service remains at the top of my list of all time favorites and listening to it brings me back to a safe place. sometimes being safe is all i need. oh, how i desire to be safe in the Father's arms once and for all.

mas surgery?

we had our annual visit yesterday to the texas children's hospital in houston and the surgeon said to come back in 8 months for another evaluation. if at that time his arm is not better than he will undergo surgery #5.

please pray specifically for his arm to be able to supinate another 10-15 degrees - essentially to be able to turn his hand palm up. the doc said that aqua therapy is probably the best thing to do, so you guessed it...my new weekend project is to put in a pool. nothing fancy, just something deep enough to do some exercises.

just fyi - we're going for a healing on this one. even though the doc said the surgery is an easy one, i don't want to do it. i need some new personal God stories, and this one looks like a good one.

i almost forgot...pray for nick. he is diligently looking for work and a new start. he has done all the right things so it is now up to the Father and his new employer to get on the same page and make this happen. i expect exciting things for nick, but i'd like to see them soon, for nick's sake.

sorry i'm not really into the blogger thing at the moment, but i am feeling much better. when i know that i won't get fired for blogging at work, i might start up again.

blessings to you all - i dream of the time of when we can all be together endlessly in the presence of the Father. PAX!

nick and i went to the church on clay street tonight to help with the lights and sound for chris' last evening service - his set originally had 32 (really thirty two) songs in it which he cut down to about 28 or so, just fyi...it was a great set. nathan you would have been so proud of those guys.

anyway it seemed that my season of bitterness and pain had passed. i had a wonderful time, really. not sure what all this means, but it felt good.

thank you for all the phone calls, emails, and IMs. i needed those more than you can imagine. thank you for loving on me the way you did. also thank you to my wonderful wife who supported me in ways i know i have never supported her. i can see clearly now, the rain is gone...isn't that a song?

drink deeply of the Spirit this week, i'm gonna try to.

believe it or not, we have a stonehenge in the hill country

after walking around the place for a while it seemed that this place was just going to lead us directly to the drug store to purchase the iraqi desert value sized jug of chigger-tox. however before we left we did seem to find some treasure in big bubba.

it seems that big bubba had a belly button after all. now that's a nugget i didn't learn from my world history days. way to go small fry ty for finding this jewel.

in case you have missed the humor that this guy brought to the iraq conflict, here is some more of the iraqi information minister. i almost hope to see this guy again sometime. he is almost as good at telling lies as bill clinton is, but Mo has the cool hat.

enjoy

this week has been very difficult and humbling at best. you see, in my professional life i've always been somewhat of a big fish in a small pond and even at times i was blessed to be a big fish in a big pond - that's the way i like it. with all the new ownership changes at my job now, i am pretty much a small fish in a large ocean or in my eyes, the worst of all possible combinations. in case you are wondering what started all of this...we migrated to a different network this week and many of us, including myself, have lost complete control and ownership of the local network responsibilities. being self reliant to figure out my own problems or getting the "thank you"s from resolving someone elses, is gone. i now have to call an 800 number and ask for help...just like everyone else.

to some degree i guess that's where i am in my spiritual life. i go through cycles of being completely self reliant and get somewhat frustrated when i have to rely on God for anything, even though i know he can fix everything if i just talk to him. it's kinda like the old testament stories of the israelites when they'd see God part the waters of the red sea and then they'd scream because they didn't have anything to eat or drink. why couldn't they just live a simple life of trust and faith? i've always thought how foolish these people were, and sometimes now i find myself doing the same things.

i'm just grateful that the Father can use things in my life to allow me to see myself from a distance to see what's right and what's not. to allow me to see the stupid things i do and feel. for whatever reason, i know that i will have to keep learning this lesson my whole life until i give in and give up and live by complete trust and faith myself. maybe i should cut those israelites some slack.

anyway, at least the Father is still teaching me. when i stop learning and growing then i guess that's when i'll start getting worried. in the mean time i i'll start calling on Him more and trusting Him to be strong in my weakness and i guess i'll have to learn that 800 number for network support.

well we've nuked another building in kerrville this week. a very simple, non-theatning office supply store close to the center of town was leveled.

intermission. (i'll come back to this one...i'm still thinking about what i want to say)

in the meantime, go read my wife's stuff or maybe take a look at my buddies lora and the other kerri - spelled with an "i" in case you are confused. :)

ode to a lawnmower

spent a little quality time with my lawnmower this morning before attempting to cut my 3' tall grass (not an exaggeration) so i wrote a poem about it. by the way, i eventually borrowed a mower from someone else and then made plans to take mine to the shop next week. here goes (don't laugh)

carburetion
calibration
frustration.

conflagration
devastation
libation.

code me baby

i heard music to me ears this week when my beloved sent me an email at work telling me she wanted to learn some html code - i got goose bumps all over and got that new-in-love feeling all over again. isn't there a saying that says the couple that codes together stays together? maybe not. anyway can you imagine cozy nights by the fire talking about meta tags and java scripts? nah, me either. (for those of you who know code, you know that one look at my blog says that i'm clueless. for those that don't know anything about code, just roll with the story). PAX

God's letter in mp3 format - various languages

my new favorite band evanescence. in my opinion the second good thing to come out of arkansas - the first good thing is probably reading this blog.

When in England at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked by the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans for Iraq were just an example of empire building by George Bush.

He answered by saying that, "Over the years, the United States has sent many of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for in return was enough to bury those that did not return."

It became very quiet in the room.

having tea with bea and andrew, but i still need a hamburger, hopefully this tea thing won't last too long. (kidding, i'm looking forward to getting to know andrew).

you better be here @ wabi.

wabiSABI has started and i'm already missing it, go read andrew's blog to see what i mean. hopefully i can get my stuff done early today and get out of the office...SOON!

this isn't going to be a come listen to whomever pitch some propaganda about some agenda to do whatever the latest ministry kick is. it is going to be the people of God come together to share encouragement, differences, support, love, community, discipleship, and God only knows what else (really). please come be a part of this with me, with us.

blessings! - see you in Austin!

not too late to come to wabiSABI.

wabi is taking on a life of its own which is great - come add your part. never before have i seen the body of christ demonstrated so profoundly as with this (i.e. we all have different giftings and talents, but yet we are all important).

pray for our troops!

a big storm rolled in last night and a thunderclap hit nearby and i thought the windows were going to blow out of the house. i guess that's as close as i can get to understanding what the people of iraq are going through. i still support our government and their efforts 100%, but hurt for those that are scared for their lives. hopefully this will be over soon and the iraqis can rebuild their lives in a post-saddam world.

also learned this week that the brother of a good friend of mine, Andy Sparkman, is with the 101st ground forces that are constantly in the news. father protect him.

upray - a KCM website, but still worth a look

inspections?

i like what gary bauer said on fox news this morning..."we finally have 250,000 real inspectors in iraq."

btw ~ on the first day of this war iraq fired 7 scud missles that saddam swore he didn't have and that were against the un resolution for him to have in his possession.

why

here's why i feel so strongly...a few weeks ago i watched several iraqi nationals talk about the struggle the iraqi people had gone through under saddam's reign. they were afraid for their lives and those of their families living there. they were all witnesses to the starvation and torture imposed upon the people by the government. the only hope they had was for someone like the US to come in and overthrow the gov't and help to restore some form of leadership that would promote economic well being and stability. the other part of that equation is that if the regime changes, the trade sanctions might be removed and the necessary food and medical supplies could enter their country. many more iraqis die everyday from the restriction of the sanctions than the war will ever kill. saddam and his army are probably the only ones not hungry in the country. we are not fighting the iraqi people, we are fighting FOR them. i am saddened that people don't understand that.

November 7, 1997: Iraqi Deputy Prime Minister Tariq Aziz: "The American government says openly, clearly, that it's not going to endorse lifting the sanctions on Iraq unless the leadership of Iraq is changed."

go get 'em W

the events of last night and today make me proud to be an American, while at the same time hurting for those that will inevitably be caught in the crossfire. i am proud that our president and leaders are removing a planetary nuisance and trying to construct a better government all while being as careful as possible. i saw a guy on cnn talk about the smart weapons, the targeting procedures, the contingency plans, and all the other protocols they go through to only destroy what absolutely needs to be. every pre-caution to protect civilian lives is being addressed. saddam is the one who puts babies and children in harms way, not us. thank God for W.

by the way - the surgical strike last night was probably the best thing we could have done under the circumstances. i guess we will know later this week how effective that was.

i was dropping off some wabi information this morning at TBC in kerrville and I got to hear nathan play and lead worship for a few minutes. if you never have heard him, you need to, really. hopefully later this year we all will be able to drive around town listening to his music as he has been working hard on a worship project. be in prayer for him as he does this, i understand that recording can be exhausting work.

i am once again on my way to new orleans - 2nd time this month - for business, so i'm kinda rushed....

one last thing - we need people with big cars, vans, SUVs or whatever to help transport people around for wabi. some of our vehicle support has fallen through and now we have some big needs. this mostly will involve driving people from the motels to FBC austin or the friday nite event or wherever. you can come drive or trade cars with me or whatever is easiest. we really have a need for this, so please contact me, dianna, shannon, or jessica as soon as you think that this may be your thing.

gotta run.

drink deeply of the Father today!

"5 is too small, i want to be 6, that's big"

today is my son's 6th birthday. 6 - not 5 or 4 (which were very hard for me) but 6. when i look at him and all that we've been through it sometimes seems like a hundred years and sometimes it seems like yesterday.

the thing that i cherish the most about my son is that many of you have had an integral part in our life with him. Specifically shannon helped us pay for the motel during one of tyler's surgeries, nathan and amy decorated our house for our return from the last surgery, and bea has made special trips to kerrville when she was in austin last year just to pray for tyler's physical healing - which started happening immediately and has continued ever since.

i thank my God for you who have invested so heavily in my life, in dianna's, and in tylers. we could not have made it without you, really. i think i understand why paul says that he thanks God every time he remembers those that supported him. just like paul, i love and need you guys in my life.

so bring on the cake (star wars of course) and let the journey continue.

get outta here

i like what shannon and nathan said better than anything i've said lately so go read their stuff...links are on the right!
blessings.

i just updated some of my links, now that i have found that some of you actually go there.

one that i am the most excited about it triad design. it is the creativity of anita roach, one of our moderators for wabiSABI. i am excited about meeting her and experiencing her work and i think you should be too.

just got back from lunch mass ~ wow ~ it was the coolest ever.

i had never been to our local catholic church, in fact the place was kinda spooky because of the 10' tall brass mary at the front. i went with a co-worker who was a regular attendee and she explained everything to me or at least as much as she could in the given time without being disrupting to anyone.

the scripture reading was intense, the songs a little monotone, but the ritual of the liturgy was incredible. it was quite participatory and interactive which connected with me very well. i think it might get too routine if i did this every week, but for special biblical occasions like this, it was powerful. i can't wait for the easter service.

happy ash wednesday ~ go to your local neighborhood church to experience ash wednesday mass. i'll tell you about mine later today.

run, run rudolph, run

it is frustrating to me that us wabis have to be multi-talented, meaning we have to figure out how to be true to our wabi-ness, while at the same time be skilled in playing all the sabi games. until we wabis are making all the rules, we have to abide by those put in place by the sabis - which to me looks more like a big game, than a rational regime.

maybe that's where i come in. i can talk church-ese and be diplomatic and i try to keep up with all the emerging information that is out there. who knows? sometime i wonder if wabiSABI will be the greatest ministry thing i've ever been a part of or if it will be another jim jones misadventure. i hope it isn't the later - i'm currently just saying NO to red kool-aid.

i hopped on the back of a shopping cart last night (one of those short stubby grocery store ones) that i had loaded full of bottled water pointed it down an incline and kicked off. i highly recommend it. btw ~ you might want to perfect your stopping before you perfect your starting. i wore out a good pair of shoes trying to stop. :) K

one of our artist moderators for wabiSABI has put a link to where some of her work can be purchased. you must go there. i am so excited that Anita is going to be a part of the experience. don't miss it.

go to wabi

as a follower of christ i guess that we are not allowed to get our feelings hurt. i mean if we are doing what he wants then our time, our money, our energy, our relationships, etc are not really our own, but part of his great orchestra. not saying that actions don't hurt, but to react based upon those feelings would be wrong...right?

an example - sometimes it is hard when the people closest to you who say they share in your same values fail to act in a manner that is consistent with that. not that everyone has to like what i stand for, but don't tell me you do and then do something else. we as believers need to be truthful and honest in our dealings with each other. my first reaction was to immediately want to blog about how mad i was and make it so those folks knew exactly why i was upset. it's been a few weeks now and the Father has shown me that i have to let it go and still love them like nothing happened. i'm still working through my theology on this one.

in case you don't know my blogging friends...meet nathan and jessica. links to their sites are on the right.

we are in austin this afternoon with shannon and jessica doing some preliminary work for wabi. the more prep we do the more excited i get. please be in prayer about being a part of this with us.

new wabi stuff

in case you haven't been there yet today...you ought to.

joshua has done great things with the wabiSABI site. go check it out and start telling others about it too.

i've been wanting to know more about the whole abide in christ thing for awhile now and last week while digging through my library (my one bookcase) i found a book entitled "abide in christ." cool thing about it is that i wasn't familiar with this book, meaning i didn't buy it, it just showed up. the book is a 31 chapter daily read to help one understand the principle.

this morning's chapter dealt with the parable of the vine and the branch. learning that the value in each is interdependent upon the other is what makes the story come alive. Jesus (the vine) needs us (the branch) to produce fruit to reach others while at the same time we need the nourishment that can only come from the vine. neither the vine nor the branch can be effective acting alone. for me it was a valuable lesson to be reminded that i don't have to do anything under my own strength. it was also refreshing to see scripture encourage me as valuable to the work of the Father. Understanding this relationship does wonders for helping me get a better grasp on the abiding part. PAX.

chruch life and a busted printer

i was talking to my mother a few days ago about how much she paid to repair an office printer. i was quite surprised that anyone would choose to repair something that essentially was a throw away item. to make matters worse, i had just purchased a new, much higher quality printer the day before for about half of the cost of her repair.

now i mean no disrespect to my mother. in fact the idea of repairing what you have instead of tossing it away is something that we all should practice more, except for the case of cheap printers and sometimes churches and/or church services.

i hear people so often say that they are trying and struggling to get their church to change to reach more or different people..in other words to repair it. now maybe you just want to be more purpose driven or contemporary, but what if you also want to be more tattoo friendly or pierced friendly or green spiked hair friendly (don't forget that jesus died for them and has a plan for their life too). will that ever happen even with an unlimited amount of church counsel meetings or focus groups or whatever pop-business-church-psyche name you want to call it? probably not.

then why do we do it? why not be faithful to what the Father has called you to do. why not empower believers to go reach these people where they are and on their terms. quit paying $100 to fix a $25 problem. there are no medals in heaven for "sticking it out" in a problematic church, but there are some for discipling the lost and for giving your life to kingdom work. don't wake up one day and realize what could have been or the lives that could have been changed by allowing the Father's love to flow through you. don't give all of that ministry up in trade for wanting one more praise chorus during the sunday 10a holy hour. dust off your feet and move on...today.

christ has come to set you free, so quit putting your chains back on.

not so super sunday

i was asked to fill in on bass guitar this sunday for a worship service - one of my most favorite things in all the world to do - so i responded with an enthusiastic YES. when i got there i was told that the praise band was the half-time "entertainment" for the super bowl. apparently the church is bringing in a large screen tv for the game and you can figure out the rest.

now i don't have anything against churches doing this type of stuff to build community, but to do it and toss in a little worship is just wrong to me. worship shouldn't be filler or stuffing, it's the main deal. what a better example for the church to show unbelievers that our corporate time with the Almighty it too important to substitute in anything else.

i just feel really weird about the whole thing. am i being too dramatic? maybe it's just because i don't care about football.

good new stuff from my beloved, angelbiscuits.

keep checking the wabi site for current information. some of the moderators and panelists are starting to dialog there. get used to me writing about this...i really believe it is for you. click wabiSABI for more information. i haven't learned my code good enough to make it link automatically.

well the weekend is over and we are back home. for us the assessment was powerful and convicting. while part of me wants to pass judgment on the churches of that area, i know that i have treated ministry the same way. i felt justified because we had a "cool" building or good music and because we were in a small city i rationalized that everyone knew about us. it was their choice if they didn't want to come.

i see now what can happen on a much larger scale over a longer period of time. with some exceptions (mostly of a specific and limited demographic), church in the killeen area is reserved for those 55 and above.

now to keep this from dragging out any further...the bottom line that i see is that it is time to take the church back to the streets. we could raise and spend millions trying to build the perfect building or compound or center or whatever, but why? Let's get on their turf - the bars, tattoo shops, community centers and so on. i believe that scripture tells of Jesus talking to prostitutes and tax collectors where they were, not after having coaxed them into some tabernacle or crusade. it could actually be a really fun ministry or at least i think so. i've always liked the controversial but correct thing - in regard to church life that is. it sucks to be vanilla.

one thing of note before i shut up. the killeen model while distinct in some areas is very common in others. we must get the gospel on the street in whatever community or city where you live. gone are the days when new churches fill up like new restaurants do on opening day. "if we build it, they will come" is not a good MO to use for church buildings, but it might be for church sponsored skate parks or gaming clubs or internet cafes or theology cigar lounges or car rallies or ______________ (whatever the Father tells you to do).

***** go to wabi ****

one more note - these thoughts are my take on the collective thoughts of the group this weekend. most of the above thoughts did not originate with me, but i don't think anyone will mind if i act on their ideas. if an assessment weekend sounds like your thing then contact me - there is another one in march.

please pray for the killeen/copperas cove/harker heights/nolanville/ft hood area. the people here are hurting much more that i would have ever imagined and the churches are so lost without a clue that it makes your heart sick. if local missionary work is your calling, pray about this area.

just a note...the irony of the whole weekend for me is that most of us here, 20 or so, are not currently involved in institutional church however we are trying to capture data to help traditional church reach these folks. truth of the matter probably is that it will actually be the emerging culture of individuals that will do the work. the tattoo artist that i spoke to today will unfortunately never be welcomed by many churches here, so they have to be loved by someone else. that someone else has yet to emerge. pray that we find that person or team or org or whatever or pray that it may be you.

PAX, really.

this weekend di and i will be part of another city assessment orchestrated by the emerging church network folks. this is always a bitter sweet time for me. sweet because it brings me back into focus of outreach and i re-tune in to what really is important as a follower of Christ. bitter because the reality of what's being done (outside of a few exceptions) is so little. with a church on every corner in some cities, why aren't we saturating communities with the gospel? are we not doing the right things or just not doing things right?

please pray for the folks doing emerging type ministries. some of these folks come under fire routinely from traditional (well-meaning) church people. as the Church community we should be heralding these ministers as heroes. they truly are carring the sword of truth to those that need it. they are seeking the lost, not just opening the doors hoping they will come in. gotta go.

evening, morning, and at noon, will i pray and cry aloud; and He shall hear my voice.
the writings of david the psalmist in chapter 55

shut your mouth and show me some love

ran into some old pew pals this week in the store and the first thing out of their mouth was "gee, we've missed you, we think about you all of the time." i don't buy it. if you truly care about someone then pick up the phone and call. show me some action, show me some jesus. i don't care what your intentions were or are.

when will the church learn that if we aren't even good enough to fool each other with a superficial type of love that we don't have a chance of reaching the hurting and distrustful lost? and the real sadness is, if you are fake to me then so what. I am still a believer. but if you are fake to a person who doesn't know Jesus, then you could make it that much harder for that person to ever believe there is a God big enough and real enough to love them.

when will christians get out of the way of the believers who want to share the saving love and grace of Jesus? will the real slim shady please stand up?

I WANT MY MTV

i am so amazed at how contemporary church is so out of touch with my age group. to get right to the point - i feel that every minister trying to reach our generation should spend an hour a day watching MTV or at the very least the top 20 countdown on VH1. just listen to the lyrics and you'll hop on the expressway to their soul. "but the stuff on MTV is so vulgar" you may say...well, hell yes it is and so is their world! nothing short of the gospel will change that. only when we can see these artists as voices for the lost around us will we understand how to reach them.

rest, yeah right?

i just went to a very worshipful service tonight where one of the questions presented was "when was a very restful time in your life"? several of the answers seemed to revolve around some type of drug (legal, but controlled) substance. why is that? why when it comes to rest does the word morphine come to mind? do we need to hike into the desert for 40 days like jesus? ahhh...maybe there was something to that. of course i won't have that much vacation time at my job for another 25 years so i guess i'm off the hook right?

if you are in san antonio check out common ground. Blessings -*k*

as i help out with this event and learn about the emerging ministries around the country that may be a part of this, i am completely humbled. some of these ministries are absolutely incredible. i knew that i couldn't attend wabi without being changed, but it is almost 3 months away and already the Father is working on me. wow.

go here for more wabi information.

from christmas my wife gave me a window sticker for my car that says

"WE ARE THE PEOPLE OUR PARENTS WARNED US ABOUT."

that is strangely convicting, but i like it. PAX -[k]

what's on tap, what's freshly brewed, and oh a coke for my friend

there are times that even as an adult that i want to fit it, to be edgy, to be whatever it is that i think i'm not. many of those times, thanks to watching too much thursday nite NBC include a good cup of coffee or a longneck at some perfect little neighborhood pub. unfortunately i like neither. now the pub is fine, but give me a cream soda or a mountain dew instead of the sam adams. the weird thing is that i've really tried to like both, but no luck.

as i start to talk to folks about emerging church ideas it seems that a lot of people are like me and my coffee - they want to like it and understand, but they don't. they can see that this is a passion of mine and a calling worthy of my life, but to them it holds no meaning. that has to be ok for both me and them. as believers we aren't commanded to agree only to love each other...so next time let's go somewhere where i can get a black cherry soda on tap.

the writings of isaiah, chapter 43
"forget all that - it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. for I am about to do a brand new thing, see, I have already begun. do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness for my people to come. I will create rivers for them in the desert!"

even though this was written several thousand years ago, it seems completely fitting for today. all over the world people are finding the spirit move in places outside the realm of institutional church. like minded individuals are coming together across denominations, oceans, and internet connections to establish communities of faith. people are stepping out in faith raising up disciples according to the leading of the spirit. it truly is a new work and it is wonderful to be a part of it.

to experience some of what the Father is doing, join us at wabiSABI in Austin, Texas in late march. collaborate, discover, and express is the theme as we come together as part of the new thing the Father is doing.

a new thing

the writings of isaiah in chapter 43
"forget all of that - it is nothing compared to what i am going to do. for I am about to do a brand new thing. see I have already begun! do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness for my people to come home. I will create rivers for them in the desert!"



come be a part of some of the new things of the Father at wabiSABI in Austin, Texas in march.

we had a wonderful time visiting with shannon, nathan, and amy and our newest friend martina. it was a sweet time of fellowship that i think the father reserves only for believers. i'm not sure that i can explain that much further, it just feels like home when you are with those that are connected. (i'm trying to dodge the christian word anointed 'cause i think it is overused, but that really is the word)

the father was in front of us, behind us, above us, below us, and in us and it was good.

follow the yellow brick road or maybe it's just hwy 290

Di and I are off to Austin this morning to spend a day or 2 with shannon and talk about wabisabi. we currently are in such a heightened state of expectation from God that i'm afraid we will stress everyone out. no worries though. we really enjoy going places and discovering God working differently in other people's lives. it helps us tear down the walls of our understanding and allow God to show himself differently and that usually means in bigger and better ways.

service for poppy

please be in prayerful support of bea and her family with the passing of her grandfather and with the services today. ask the father to renew strength in her 80 year old grandmother and give her daily encouragement until the grand reunion one day.

things that go bump

last night an unidentified noise woke me up, no big deal other than not being able to figure out what it was. for me this is odd. my dad has taught me in so many creative ways to identify sights, sounds, etc with very little information, and this skill usually means that i can go back to sleep after figuring out where the noise originated. after a few minutes of processing, i got up and proceeded to my 5 yr old's room to do some investigation. when i got there i flipped on the light switch and waited for my eyes to adjust to the light.

after a few minutes i looked around and laughed. the room looked like it was the inside of a snow globe - like someone had picked it up and shook it violently - in other words...normal. short of a small car protruding through the window, i would never be able to find out what was out of place or where the noise had come from.

my question...why does our spiritual life look like that so often? why, when there is a noise of something broken or out of place or wrong (usually a warning signal) that we look and aren't able to find it? why does it sometimes take something so huge and dramatic to show us where the problems are? wouldn't it be better to keep our life in order so that we can get back on track when we notice something small? like why did David have to commit adultery and murder before he realized that he was off course? why didn't he hit the brakes when he first started to scan the roof tops for the bathing ladies?

happy new year blessings! K

BTW - i ended up replacing the hot water heater in my house this last weekend and it went much better than my roofing adventure (more about that later if anyone wants to know). if anyone needs help in this area, please call me. i actually had fun doing it. :)

glimpses

i just talked to a friend of mine that i met while summer youth pastoring in arkansas a bunch of years ago and was strongly encouraged by it. y'know i believe when we get to heaven we will be incredibly amazed at how the father was able to work even through our crummy lives. how one word of good that was said out of so many words of junk, was used to encourage someone or to help someone hurting or whatever. how cool it is when we are able to see the father's work while we are still able to do his work.

thank you father for that glimpse of you and your goodness. donnie i look forward to being able to spend time with you again one day and talk about all the catfish we caught.

PEZ (no, i mean PAX) Kerry

shame on you, kerry

i was just listening to some messages from a guy named j john from across the pond somewhere and i got excited about what he said. long story short - he said he had shown movies (of which one was The Godfather) during several church services and more people came to Christ during the "movie services" than all the other services of the year combined.

the reason this was interesting to me was that before our great exodus from the little local church, this idea had been brought to the leadership board about a movie night. this was not to be during the service mind you, but a separate evening. the answer received was "no, that is too secular of a thing for a church to do" and the idea was scrapped.

i guess you can draw your own conclusions, but apparently those of us with the movie idea were not too far off base as we were led to believe. thanks for the affirmation j john.

i think i have to replace the water heater in my home...anybody wanna help?

Yippee, Christmas is over and we all have survived (as far as i know at the moment). mine was excellent and i probably would not have changed a thing, but i'm still glad it's done. here's a close up just to show my excitement...i look just like nathan's dog abigail.

merry christmas

here's a cheesy little "i don't want to be at work the day before christmas" pic. may the holiness of the Father renew your soul. PAX

marked in the stars

we went to the bethlehem star presentation last night - i highly recommend it. for me it was an "in my face" realization that i have made God too small. not that i didn't think he could order the stars and the heavens, but in my mind that was probably just sunday school stuff. what was demonstrated to me last night, along with scripture, showed me that God's design is so much more than i could ever imagine. it also re-created a holy fear of awe and respect toward the father that i think so often is forgotten.

(from the website) For if the Star wasn't magic or a special miracle from outside of the natural order, then it was something even more startling. It was a Clockwork Star. And that is overwhelming. The movement of the heavenly bodies is regular, like a great clock. The Clockwork Star finally means that from the very instant at which God flung the universe into existence, he also knew the moment he would enter human history in the person of Jesus of Nazareth. He marked it in the stars. And from before the beginning of time as we experience it, God knew the very moment when Messiah would breath his last on the cross.

Jesus is "the Lamb that was slain from the creation of the world."
Revelation 13:8

one of my good friends in the faith told me a few days ago that i shouldn't be "gone" from the (corporate) church too long. i completely respect this person and his thoughts, but i see the issue differently. please continue to pray with us and for us as we seek to be obedient to the new works of the Father in the texas hill country or wherever else he may want us. blessings and peace

now you tell me, am i right to have wanted a pic of this? this was taken after it was all over.

take the bait

tonight tyler had his kindergarten christmas program...or so we thought. when we got to the church - he goes to a lutheran private school - the pastor in charge said "thank you for attending tonights service, we ask that there be no photography of any kind because it is a worship service." WHAT!!! i'm here to see my 5 year old sing the wrong words to all the songs, make faces at me, and laugh on stage with all the other kids and this guy tells me that i can't take any pictures???? and where did the worship service thing come from?

after taking a breather and deciding that i can take pics after it is over, i got real sad...not for me, but for all those people that think that a house of GAWD (as this guy kept saying in his 20 minute dialogue during the program) is all about fake holiness and stuffiness. tonight should have been about fun and laughter and celebration instead of my boy getting in trouble because his 6' paper mache staff kept falling over. jesus said let the little children come, and play, and laugh, and climb all over me and he would have allowed people to take pictures if kodak (and lomo of course) had been around at that time.

aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!! I still can't believe it!! no pictures and a cheap bait and switch gospel routine on top.

quality, quantity, and a little egg nog

this christmas season is one of my family's first in many years to not be heavily involved in a church and i'm trying to process those feelings. usually this time of year means late night planning sessions, arguments over punch, finger sandwiches, parties, lighting, sound systems and when to have the official church christmas service or candlelight eve service or whatever...when all that is done, we try to squeeze in a little family christmas.

it's not that i didn't like all those things. one of my favorite all time worship moments was the christmas service at the soul cafe last year. many of us spent a bunch of time assisting the master (nathan) at making the service happen. we received joy from doing the work as well as joy from the service itself. i would do it all again if i could.

and now this year is different.

no corporate church, no program, no late night planning...just a handful of folks who are trying to love each other as christ demonstrated. not that this couldn't be a part of a larger story, it just happens not to be at the moment. i think it is all part of the Father trying to slow me down to talk to me. (yes, i'm still dealing with this issue). more later...

3 members of our community group have been involved in traffic accidents within the last 10 days. we no longer assume that those around us will always be there - we almost lost part of our family in each of the accidents.

don't get too busy to love each other. - Blessings.

where are we

i am just wondering why a rock star must do what the people of the most high God won't. i have heard bono say he is a believer, so no mean emails. PAX

bluebonnet street group

tonight we will be meeting at jillian's home for food and some get together time. maybe we will post some pics later. prayer will not be held at bluebonnet street. come pray, eat and laugh with us at jill's.

blessings

original angel biscuits

my gifted wife with some original stuff. oh, to have her talent. angel biscuits

my boy and his fish (yes, we let it go)
PAX

10 reasons why your church sucks

a classic article by pastor john of gink. it's worth a read if you have never seen it and if you have, read it again. you can find it here at the ooze site or at the gink site.

it's unfortunate that the word sucks and church can be appropriately used in the same sentence...let's be the history making generation that changes that.

ET anyone?

i'm usually not a big sci-fi fan that gets much enjoyment out of star-trek, dune or the latest 4 hour wannabe epic movie by kevin costner. however...the whole roswell incident thing fascinates me to no end and i enjoy watching shows about that. this last weekend i found myself glued to the sci-fi channel watching Steven Spielberg's mini-series taken. so far i have "invested" 12 hours of my life into the total of 20 hours of the series and i can't wait til tonite for another 2 hours for episode 7.

It is interesting to watch the drama of the characters unfold as they pursue their purpose in life, their search for happiness, their search for truth, and ultimately for life changing answers. While this drama is so fascinating to me because of the alien stuff, if i am honest with myself, i have to admit that i'm searching for the same things they are. not only that, but the journey of their search is interesting to watch and i guess exciting to experience. if all the answers were given in the first hour, then what fun would it be. i guess our journey in life could be viewed the same way.

Don't drop your link

i work for the local phone company where life usually is pretty slow and routine, and that's ok with me.

this morning was different. sometime during the night, a microwave link went down and now this place looks like an ant bed that someone just stepped on. people are answering calls as fast as they can, techs are driving all across the country, engineers are scratching their head, and we still we don't have the issue resolved. i don't know a whole bunch about microwave technology, but i know that if one goes down, you can't use some ATM machines, buy gas with a credit/debit card, make long distance calls, connect to some web sites, conduct business, etc. one little connection goes bad and life as you know it stops.

i can't help but think about the picture this paints about prayer. as followers of Jesus, we have got to stay plugged in to the source. we can't allow our connection to the Truth go down. we've all seen good people and good ministries lose direction and purpose by losing their connection, so don't drop that link. PAX.

The heavens declare

was the star of Bethlehem really an astrological event? was Jesus so important that even the heavens declare his glory as the scriptures teach? check out the Bethlehem star presentation site. if you are in Texas, there is a chance you could see the presentation live. for those others that have to endure living elsewhere, you are stuck with the site.

Lift your eyes and look to the heavens: Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host one by one, and calls them each by name. Because of his great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing. -the writings of Isaiah in chapter 40

we will not be having a group at our house this week. you can be still praying as we will. hopefully we can pick this back up again soon.

Don't go away mad

to steal a line from an old motley crue song...don't go away mad, just go away...

so when people start to leave a ministry, do you:
a) pray for them because they must have something wrong and it is better for them to leave
b) hold the door open for them to assist their leaving and say "we'll pray for you"
c) tell everyone that it was God's will for them to leave, so let them go
d) thank God that you are relieved of the responsibility of ministering to them
e) go find them, love them, and walk with them

i have never been involved in a ministry that did letter "e". why is that? surely this must be important otherwise we wouldn't have the parable of the lady searching the entire house for one mite. i'm not sure how much a mite translates to in today's economy, but a person must be more valuable than that coin. and how about the parable of the lost sheep. the shepherd left the 99 in search for the 1. i'm open to the idea that maybe that one had a better offer from another shepherd...you know the grass is always greener in another pasture...but still the shepherd should go find out what the real story is. you don't just ignore the one or it becomes two, and then 20, and then you wake up and you are no longer a shepherd. this being the case i would question if that person was ever a shepherd to begin with.

the teachings of jesus are there for a reason. how can we reach out to the lost if we can't even reach out to each other?

as i toured the shops of Abilene this last weekend i looked for a really cool, intense evangelistic sticker for my car...i realized there was no such thing. i did however end up with a great ozzy window sticker in the shape of a cross. i really think this fits me better.

Doxaqeren

i'm excited about what the Father is creating in Austin. pray for the leadership community as they seek to be obedient. for more information check out their blog.

monday blessings!

Dianna and I got to spend the last few days in Abilene, Texas. From what I’ve seen here, this place is the rhinestone in the buckle of the bible belt. That being the case we thought we would find some great alternative or warehouse worship places or some outstanding creative ministry ideas. WRONG or at least the folks at the christian book stores didn’t have any idea of any.

I did learn of a ministry called Isaiah 58 which feeds the 1000+ homeless of the area and actually trains them to find work. Taking it to the streets, Jesus in action.

Home is where the heart is?

Interesting statement. As a believer where is our heart and subsequently where is our home? Now of course from an earthly standpoint this is easily understood and usually readily identified on a map. However, from a spiritual standpoint, this is neither.

My soul, longing deeply for the fulfillment of the Father, seeks the movements of the Father or seeks to be a part of what the Father is doing. As we seek the Father and our soul is filled, we find deeper meaning and fulfillment in our spiritual person. Or so my theory goes. But did I mention that the flesh doesn't necessarily understand this, nor does it desire to follow the Father, especially when it involves risk or uncomfort or uncertainty?

Well, that’s where I find myself. Just as a child plays the hide and seek game with the “you’re getting warm, warmer, hot, you found it rules” it seems that at the moment the further I am from home the “warmer” things become. Could it be that the Father is preparing me for a move away from my physical home in order to draw me closer to a spiritual home? Pray for us on this one.